I wrote them up because sometimes feelings are better described by words. Hover around your cursor on ribbon, paper clips and pens to find the navs. Enjoy the explorace. Cheers! :)
cheers from author.
ummi's daughter, baba's little girl. their one and only Ain Fatihah.
like me? do stay. hate me? please walk away. you may ask my age, but not my weight. cheers! :)
31 May 2015
I had a fever since yesterday. it comes in stages where it begins with sore throat and flu (selsema). I lost my sense of taste and smell but luckily I still have my appetite. so yesterday there was nobody at home except me and baba. I was so hungry and went hunting for food in the kitchen. I ate 2 plates of rice since I was hungry like a monster hahah. umi came back home from kenduri and asked, "kak ain dah makan nasi?" I nodded. "ehh nasi dalam periuk tu dah basii!" and I was like, "basi ke mi, takdok rasa and bau mende pun haha!" then I realized that my tastebuds weren't functioning at that moment so I just pasrah. "it's okay, toilet ada" I whispered. haha. glad I didn't experience diarrhea after that! alhamdulillah.
and alhamdulillah, I felt relief upon wake up this morning. my head's dizzy a little bit, might be because of the drugs I consumed yesterday. but still, the sneeze and sore throat didn't wipe theirselves away from myself yet. I went to work as usual. my voice was a bit 'sengau' so today I just keep myself quiet. I talked a little. my labwork was done at 11 am since today nothing I have to do much. I walked with kaksu and suddenly she muttered, "ain nampak pucat. pegila balik." and ohh I was like, really? I was still okay to walk and drive at that moment, so I drive myself home at 3 pm. everthing's okay except for my throat. or tonsils to be exact. swollen. it's painful and I can feel that my it becomes narrower and narrower. and every time I encounter this kind of pain, fever would always come up next.
and since lately I often experience headache, baba checked my blood pressure just now. and guess what, my blood pressure is low! tsk tskk. that's why la I frequently having headache and kadang kadang rasa nak pitam! pernah sekali, I was washing the apparatus in the lab when suddenly I felt like my eyes were closed and it was all dark. it happened for few minutes and I almost fainted, but fortunately nothing happened. but the headache still ongoing for a week. yes, a week. but then I just ignore because I am lazy seeing the doctor haha. (doctors must mad with me upon reading this, haha. kan salsabila?)
and as for now, I try my very best to get back the normal blood pressure. maybe I should slow down my labwork, not too hard I think, and maybe I shall go back home early everyday so I would have enough time to rest. ehh? haha. or maybe I should bla bla bla (and the list goes on).
hari ni sampai rumah pukul 6 petang. biasalah, sejak sejak drive sendiri ni balik pun suka hati lah. kadang2 ada kerja tak setel lagi, lab tak siap lagi and tak kurang juga bergosip tak abes lagi hahah mana boleh tinggal gosip tergendala cenggitu, tak best. nanti terlepas train haha. so hari ni balik je baba pun oyak gini, "kelik lewat lewat ni gi ngorat dulu ko?" HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, I burst into laughter, dengan umi. ni first time baba oyak gini. lawok ngat eh haha. and I replied, "hm kalu ado buleh jugok tu ba. gud idea." hahah baba pun diam.
I miss you much. big much. and damn much. I am dying of missing u both. crazy how kids could make you feel warmth, happy and blessed. balik balik lonelynya rasa. rumah sunyi sepi. takde orang nak hugs and kisses and tenyeh tenyeh (all come in a package) sampai puas hati hahah. or, ohh maybe it's time for me to have kiddos on my own tapi kena la cari ayahnya dulu iye dok hahah.
yesterday was my very first time entering the clean room. clean room is actually a lab, and it is a place dealing with cell culture. most of the pgroomers do the cell culture thingy so everytime they talked about the cell (thaw, cryo, passage and bla bla bla), I was like... krik krik krik, diam membisu nak menyampuk pun taktahu. somehow I feel like, urghh ruginya taktahu -.-
doing cell culture is not my field. none in my milestone of my MSc journey either. err or maybe not yet? who knows suddenly Dr terbukak hati nak add on and discover new methodology and findings in my research field yang I tengah buat sekarang ni kan. but I pray it will never be. I'd be at the greatest convenience to learn this for my own knowledge, but to do it or to add it into my research is a no. it's riskyyy, and tiring! more tiring than doing microbe thingy. but still, it's good for my own knowledge and I hope to learn the very basic things about cell culture one fine day.
and ohh, the moment I entered clean room, I chuckled and giggled and laughed and semualah in my heart. damn it's funny haha! imagine all the researchers inside are all now like aliens! they have to wear a jumpsuit which covers from head to toe, a mask and a Mc Donalds' shoes, haha. it feels like seeing astronaut working on the moon, but with gravity haha. clean room is special, very special. you have to pass thru a blower before entering the place, where the blower functions to discard all unwanted particles accumulated on you and the jumpsuit. memang whoaaaa jakun sat masuk clean room! happiness to the max! hihik.
I'm sorry for showing you this hideous selfie of myself but I want to show you this is how 'alien' or 'asronaut' look like in the clean room, haha.
microbe and cell culture thingy are very crucial in biomaterials and cosmetic industry. sebab sebelum sesuatu produk itu dihasilkan, it has to pass thru the toxicity and bacterial activity evaluation then baru boleh release produk. well I am still hoping to get myself involved in cosmetic industry one fine day. ada rezeki, in sya Allah.
till then, see me when I see you.
the stupidest, silliest and most ridiculous thing I have ever done not just today, but also the past few days and months. Allah bagi hidayah hari ni. sedih, sebab semua tu turn into a waste. grateful, sebab dah belajar dari kesilapan so ada peluang untuk baiki di masa akan datang.
arghhh, gila tak sedih T__T sedih and grateful sama banyak perasaan dia.
have our first journal club today, weeee. I like it, very much. it's a moment of knowledge sharing, where everybody sits down and listens to the presentation. the Q&A session turns out to be a discussion cenggitu je among us. no need to worry, no need to shy. if u cannot answer the question, Dr. D will play her role. haha. a momento with supervisor and supervisees. and ohh I can see what myself will be doing in few weeks time, haha. cari jurnal, buat slide and present. kompem kalut nanti haih (walaupun turn last sekali haha). I do enjoy today's presentation (it's kakhan's turn), or ohh honestly I memang enjoy tengok orang lain present but I hate it when it comes to my turn! please excuse me for that. my presentation skill is bad.
*kerja dah mula membukit and menggunung. banyaknya laaahai nak kena buat. test sample kemain laju, tapi bila sampai part analyse to slow sikit. malas, sebab kena pk banyak. FTIR, flexural, sat naaa. next week buat synthesis, weehoo! boleh tuang tuang acid main chemical balik yeayy! :)*
ok jumpa lagi!